One of my life long dreams is to be my own boss. For my entire career, starting in college, I have been a loyal corporate drone. Work late into the night? Of course! Weekends and holidays? No problem, Boss! Travel to Northern Canada in negative 30 degree weather? Good thing I’m wearing my long johns! I am a master of coffee room small talk, board room niceties, and the delicate orchestrations of office politics.

In exchange for my tacit compliance to the overlords of capitalism, I receive the security of a known source of income deposited neatly into my checking account every two weeks. I have the privileged luxury of knowing my medical needs would be financially covered if I finally have an accident clumsy enough to require a cast or stitches. Day in and day out, I watch the seasons of the year change from the ivory tower of commerce my office resides in. My grey cubical walls are covered in the reminders that I am not just a drone, that I am an individual contributor to the overall corporate organization who brings her own ideas and skills to the part I play. The days stretch into new seasons that stretch into years as each task beats out a rhythm of time passing. Until one day when the perfect balance I’ve created stops in a sudden cacophony of cymbals and crashes in my ears. That day I am no longer a needed instrument in the orchestrations of the company. That day I pack myself up and leave my chair and walk into the unknown.

As an Only Child, I’ve learned to use my imagination and create entire worlds of life inside my head. I’ve been a doctor, astronaut, fighter pilot, famous actress, successful business woman, nurse, lawyer, wife, mother and published author in the vast worlds my mind can create. What I’ve never been is sure of what I want to be when I grow up. Our society allows us to bump along in the wind as long as we pay taxes and appear to have some semblance of responsibility in place. Houses, cars, nice clothes, romantic partners are all the bounty of “having it together” that exemplify our defacto choices to accept a cookie cutter life.

Now in my mid – thirties, I have a unique opportunity to take the time to really discover what I want to do for my life’s work for the next 40 years to life. I might need to cling to the shores of financial security for my daily income, but I have the chance to actively explore who I was supposed to be all along. Maybe she is a fighter pilot at heart, but now is the time to find out. For myself most of all.